Last week I challenged all of you adventurous readers to choose how you would conduct yourself during a once-in-a-lifetime dinner date with someone you’ve always wanted to meet. Reasons were given in support of choosing the crab walk and reasons were given in support of inside out/backwards outfits. No abstentions this week as readers were pretty clear on what they’d choose.
Me thinks I need a more difficult question this week.
But first, my answer.
Both the crab walk and the inside out/backwards clothes options would be incredibly embarrassing to me as a leans-towards-shy introvert. Both draw unwanted attention. Neither one is quickly done and then forgotten. How to choose?
I decided to do my own experiment. As any good scientist will tell you, a random sampling of subjects is good practice. Unfortunately, strangers in line at the store or the cafe begin to shy away from the crazy lady asking for volunteers to crab walk or to turn their clothes inside out and backwards. Sometimes, restraining orders are involved. Because of these and other legal issues I won’t go into here, I was forced to conduct the experiments on myself.
So, one evening after everyone was asleep (I do have some pride, you know), I downed my Old Estonian Spritzer and then proceeded to crab walk from one end of the house to the other. I found it to be quite challenging to do in a skirt and heels. Then, I went back to my room, turned my clothes inside out and backwards, and then sat down to eat a snack to gauge comfortability of the outfit. My top and skirt weren’t too problematic, but the undergarments and tights? They are made to go a certain way for a reason, people.
So, with my data in hand, I sat down to analyze which scenario would cause me the least amount of grief. And so what would I choose?
The crab walk.
Why? Because eating a meal with someone I’m both excited and nervous to meet while my undergarments are all discombobulated would be more difficult for me to deal with than crab walking in and out of the restaurant. And like some readers have commented, you could have a few beverages and then make it a trendy thing by having your dinner date join you in doing it. Y’all are brilliant.
And now, on to this week’s question…
Would you rather
only be able to speak in recognizable quotes from movies and songs
– OR –
have to use Pig Latin forever?
So, witty readers, what would you choose? Will it be an eternity of quotes or Pig Latin? How will you choose to
annoy speak to your friends or family? Sit, sip, and share. I always love hearing from you.