Taking Tea in the Kasbah

I am usually a think-it-through kind of person, someone who makes pro/con lists and weighs personal choices against the possible outcomes and consequences. But there are those occasions when I do things that are slightly lacking in intelligence. Then, in the aftermath of those precious moments during which I am fully experiencing the effects of my choices, I create a mental note to not do the unwise thing again.

This, unfortunately, is not a fail-safe plan.


In an effort to shy away from eventually becoming a Darwin Award recipient, I will humilate myself share the mental notes I’ve recently collected. In doing so, I hope to not only remind myself of these lapses in judgement, but also to save you, fine readers, from making these same mistakes.

Here are some recent, quirky moments when I didn’t really think it through:


Note to self: A glass of wine is not a good substitute for water following your workout. It does not replenish lost fluids no matter how you justify it. And in case you forget, those sharp cramps in your calf that wake you in the middle of the night will be glad to remind you.

Note to self: Sitting for hours propped up in bed while writing your novel also falls under the heading of Not Good. Neither is the semi-debilitating lower back problems you’re developing from poor posture. Just because you can do a pretty good Downward Dog pose in yoga doesn’t mean you can be a slacker in the posture department. Find a new place to do most of your writing.

Note to self: Prioritize getting that treadmill desk before writing becomes a literal pain in your a$$.

Note to self: Don’t be such a sucker for a cliffhanger ending. Of course the sexy, shirtless vampires on the Vampire Diaries will leave you wondering if they will defeat Klaus or if Stephan will overcome his shadow side (don’t tell me – I’m only half way through Season 3). Stop sacrificing sleep for the vampires. (Unless it’s Eric Northman. That’s forgivable.)

Alexander Skarsgard, True Blood, Eric Northman

Image credit ~ Konjeetahay via Flickr

Note to self: When you get to that really, really sad part in the audio book you’re listening to in the car on the way to work, PAUSE IT and listen to it later. There’s no amount of face powder that will cover up your reddened, tear-stained cheeks before you have to help run that meeting full of supervisors fifteen minutes after you arrive.

Note to self: See above note whenever you think it’s a good idea to listen to Mumford and Son’s “After the Storm” on the way to work. This is more of an On-the-Way-Home kind of song.



Note to self: Don’t give the extroverted 12 year-old more evidence to support her claim that she should have a friend over all day, every day by explaining the differences between introverts and extroverts. You’ll never hear the end of “But you know I recharge by hanging out with people!”

masters of the argument

Note to self: In a similar stroke of brilliance on your part, don’t give the Teenager more argumentative ammunition by using techniques like collaborative problem solving when teaching her how to work through issues with others. She will learn the skills and then use them for evil. Against you. Sentences like, “I’m only hearing what works for you and not what works for me” will come out of her mouth during the 8,426,795th argument she’ll try to start with you. And yes, those words will haunt you for years to come.


And there you have it – some shiny pearls of wisdom humbly passed on to you so that you may go forth wiser and better informed than I. And if you catch me drinking a glass of wine post workout as I sit with poor posture while writing, listening to sad songs and inadvertently giving my children new ways to argue with me under the guise of “parenting”, just shake your head and make me read this list again. And again.

So tell me, intelligent readers, do you have any notes to self to add to the list? Anything you’ve caught yourself doing lately and made a mental note to NOT do again? Sit, sip some truth serum tea, and share. I’d love to hear from you.

22 thoughts on “Notes to Self

  1. Ooh, I wish I’d known that one when I was in high school: “I’m only hearing what works for you and not what works for me” My mom “made” me and my three sisters all read “I’m OK, You’re OK” which we also figured out how to use against her. DO NOT under any circumstances make teenagers read self-help books. They can AND WILL figure out how to use that knowledge help themselves in ways you never saw coming. 😉

    • I’m learning that lesson the hard way. Sometimes I find I’m at a distinct disadvantage being a parent who is also a therapist. 😉

  2. on ,
    marcia said:

    “I’m only hearing what works for you and not what works for me!” is too choice a cut of slam. It seems you have a budding politician on your hands! Watch out, she’s going places!

  3. Wine? After a work out? Not good?

    In the interest of science, I can not take your word for it, Tami. Sheldon Cooper demands I conduct my own experiment then consult to see if our conclusions are comparable.

    • Yes, please do your own experiments and then report back. And if you find some wine that has some great post workout hydrating effects, please send me a bottle.

      • on ,
        livrancourt said:

        I think white wine would be preferable to red. There are more nutrients. Says the health care professional. Who has very limited knowledge for patients who weigh over five pounds. And when it comes to Eric, EVERYTHING is excusable.

        • White wine? Hmmm… I’ll have to get some Sauvignon Blanc and try it. An experiment, if you will. Like Sherry is conducting. We’ll swap notes on the hydrating effects of different varietals. I see a future blog post in the making…

          Unfortunately, I am Eric-less at the moment. I wish I had HBO and could have seen the most recent season of True Blood. I have to wait for it to come out on dvd. *sigh*

          • on ,
            livrancourt said:

            Psst….Eric hangs out in the library. He’s in most bookstores, too.

            • Eric and I have spent many an hour between the sheets – of paper in Ms. Harris’ novels, that is. Seeing him in the flesh is always a teensy bit more tantalizing, though. 😉

              • on ,
                livrancourt said:

                I don’t know, see, cuz while Alexander Skarrrssgaarrd is pretty, the Eric in my head had a three or four year head start. THAT’S my Eric…

                • The Eric in MY head was gorgeously hot, and then came the Eric of True Blood and blew that other guy out of the water.

    • I think my cautionary Note to Self regarding wine after a workout has gone awry with readers in the kasbah. It seems I am in good company for having thought it was a good idea in the first place. Carry on, then. And report back on your discoveries. I’m needing to know which wines are good to have post workout.

  4. My kids are already using what I say and the way I say it against me, and my eldest is almost 7 *yikes* I’ve got to start thinking before I speak 🙂

  5. It was difficult to concentrate on your writing after I scrolled far enough to catch a glimpse of Alex Scarsgard. Is this the time to publically admit my star crush on this man and that now I only watch True Blood in hopes that he will be shirtless? Hmm…that may fall into the Note-to-Self category. Note: Declarations on the internet may come back to haunt you.

    • I like to think the kasbah is a safe place in which to do declare such things. But if Declarations of crushes fall under Notes to Self, I fear I will be haunted for decades to come.

      Who watches True Blood for any other reason than Eric? Getting to see him is the one of the few reasons I’ll sit through the gore and violence of the show.

  6. on ,
    Ellen Gregory said:

    I experimented with post workout wine this evening in fact… I feel mighty fine indeed! (I also had a glass of water!) it was red, for the record.)

    • I felt great while I was drinking the wine. It was the middle of the night leg cramps brought on by dehydration that had me second guessing my post workout wine consumption.

      I have to say that I’m feeling a small twinge of pride in the plethora of experiments going on out there in response to my Note to Self. All in the name of science, of course. Good work, people!

  7. Your kids will use your words with their kids in the future. Mark my words!
    Grat post. I love the “recharge” quote. That works for me, too.

    • I had to stifle a laugh when the 12 year old reminded me she “recharges” by having friends over. And, the funniest part is, it’s true for her.

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