Taking Tea in the Kasbah

Dear Tami,

The level of detailed discernment applied to screening potential guests for The List makes me thankful and appreciative I passed as easily as I did. Thank you for not revealing more about the unfortunate things that happened during my interview. Given how closely you guard the location of the writing cave, I have no doubt my secret is safe with you.

It looks like you have plenty of volunteers to help you with the dinner party once you have finalized The List. Wait staff are covered as are dishwashers and bouncers, though there seems to be one important role not covered yet. I didn’t see anyone offering to be the D.J. Put me down for that one, would you? Knowing you, I’ll bet you’ve already installed the outdoor dance floor and disco ball. You’ll be needing someone to keep the tunes going. For that, I’m your guy.

Benedict Cumberbatch, Anna Karenina premiere

I’ve been busy this past week and so I must offer apologies for the brief letter. In the past several days, I had the privilege of attending two premieres: Stephen Hawking’s new documentary series, Stephen Hawking’s Grand Design, and the cinematic premiere of Anna Karenina. In case you haven’t listened to the preview of me narrating Stephen’s documentary yet, here is the brief video clip:


So in case you haven’t been keeping track, it was six months ago that you slipped into the writing cave presumably to avoid distractions and finish your novel. And in those six months, I’ve been patiently waiting for you to emerge with a completed novel in hand so we can once again have an adventure.

And waiting.

And waiting some more.

Not that I’m passing judgment, mind you. I remember quite well how challenging it can be to get ideas formed into coherent sentences and paragraphs when I was King of the Kasbah last month.

Because you continue to decline my dialogue and character suggestions, I thought I would find a new way to assist you in finishing your novel by searching for a theme song for the writing cave. Brilliant idea, right? What? Writing caves don’t have a theme songs? Well, they should. If your presidential candidates can have one, then the writing cave can, too. Yours could be the first one that starts the trend.

Here’s my first suggestion. Yes, there’s some swearing in this one, but it really adds to the overall theme. Give it a listen:


Besides touching on elitism issues, it’s a great song about something as important and mundane as the humble comma. Perfect for a writing cave, don’t you think?

Benedict Cumberbatch

Don’t worry if that song isn’t The One. I’ll continue my research for the ideal writing cave theme song and send you more suggestions in the coming weeks. I’ll also work on coming up with a proper D.J. name for myself for your dinner party. I’m open to suggestions but I’m also a bit skeptical of the things that will come out of your imaginative mind. You did send me weequashing after all.

Suggestively yours,



*Editor’s note: The views, ideas, and opinions expressed in the Letters from Benedict series are works of fiction and obviously did not come from the actor himself. This series is my way of expressing adoration for Mr. Cumberbatch and his work and is not intended to be taken as a true collaborative writing endeavor with him.

16 thoughts on “Letters from Benedict: On Theme Songs & D.J. Names

  1. Has that “editor’s note” been there before? I don’t remember seeing it. Are you getting hate mail from crazed fans or something?

    • Yeah, it’s been there over the last few weeks. Seemed like a good idea even though it detracts a little from the whimsy of the letters. In the previous letter I wrote in the comments how I’ve felt worried over these last six months about how these letters might be perceived, especially by my ‘co-author’ on the absolutely microscopic chance they’re brought to his attention. I know y’all who are regular readers know where I’m coming from since you’ve been reading from the beginning. But there’s always that rare chance that someone will read them and not fully get what I’m doing with these silly things.

  2. Ha! I love that Benedict is working on a theme song for your writing cave. Loved his first suggestion, but I’m sure he has a few more up his sleeve. 😉

    • He claims he has further research to do so I’m sure I’ll be seeing more suggestions in the coming weeks. I may have readers help me decide by voting for their favorite.

    • It’s a great suggestion, isn’t it? You can certainly have the song for yours if I end up not using it. 🙂

  3. Dear Benedict,
    I’ve heard another song by Vampire Weekend, but I didn’t know about this one. I’ve been listening to a lot of Beck in my writing cave lately. I don’t have a theme song either.

    • Your cave should have a theme song, too! We’ll see what songs he comes up with over the next several weeks and if there’s one that suits your fancy, by all means take it.

    • It remains a contender. I’m just waiting to see what else he sends me before I make a final decision. 🙂

  4. Hi, Tami! Thanks for signing up for the chocolate blogfest today. I think I’m a tad too early, but I’ll try back later.

  5. on ,
    marcia said:

    Yes, the writing cave must have a theme song….what a great idea!

  6. I have to hand it to you, Tami. You always manage to find a way to keep these Benedict fresh, interesting, and entertaining. Great job all around 🙂

    • Thanks, Mike. I have to admit some weeks it is challenging and I question the longevity of this series. But, as long as the collective genius we use shows up and does his part, then the letters will continue to appear.

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